Happy 10th Anniversary Speedo Man

I did my first triathlon 10 years ago at James Island County Park. I was out of shape and about 20 lbs overweight. This was before I had kids. Bar hopping, late night runs to Taco Bell, and sleeping till noon on weekends were the norm.

I’m not really sure what made me want to do a triathlon, but I thought it sounded pretty cool. I asked around, trying to get some info on what to expect, but no one could help me. The only person I could find with any kind of experience was one of my brother’s good friends who swam for the University of Florida, so I called him up to get some pointers.

After a lengthy conversation about stroke efficiency and open water swim techniques (none of which made any sense to me by the way), he said, “and you got to wear a Speedo, it will cut down on drag.” But he didn’t stop there, he went on to say that it needed to be a size smaller than my current waist size – it needed to be skin-tight.

How can you argue with a collegiate swimmer? I went out and bought a size 32 Speedo. To say it was tight would be an understatement. To say it cut the circulation off in my legs would be more accurate.

You ever had that dream where you go to school or work, but your naked? That’s the feeling I had walking around the transition area before the swim start.

And things didn’t get any better once the race started. I had a terrible swim. I was dying within 50 meters. The bike was just as brutal. I could barely turn the pedals. And with that Speedo digging into my groin and buttocks, I was uncomfortable, and in pain. If someone had rode past me (and most of the field did ride past me) and said, “Hey buddy, say no to crack,” I don’t think I could have even laughed. It was that bad.

The run took it to a whole other level of pain. I felt like I was carrying a refrigerator. I finished in 1 hour and 40 minutes, in the last 20 or so out of 300 racers.

That was my first race experience, and I’m happy to say, I’ve gotten faster. I still have the Speedo by the way. I’ve never raced in it again, but I break it out for parties every once in a while (don’t ask).

The thing is, I wasn’t ready for my first race, but I’m so glad I did it. It got the ball rolling for what has become a huge part of my life. I’m glad I didn’t wait until I was in shape, or until my friends agreed to do it with me, or until I had a better bike. And most of all, I’m glad I wore that Speedo.

When I think of that guy, clueless and out of shape, standing at the swim start in that tight Speedo, I smile. I want to give him a high five and tell him thanks.

I’ll be racing at James Island again this summer. And I think it’s only fitting that on the 10th anniversary of my first race I break out the Speedo again. It’s time. And when I cross the finish line, I’m going to give that guy a high five.